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I once spent too long casually dating someone I not-so-casually liked. At first, it was casual.

On a scale Looking for dating or something one to love, I was somethinb a three: Then, he told me he wasn't looking for a relationship. So naturally, I caught all of the feelings and spent six months torturing myself until he moved away. When the next guy I dated asked me, "What are you looking for?

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Because I'm looking for something serious. Such is the hypocrisy of my life: I tend to want what I can't have. Very much in therapy, don't worry.

Fir become more normal for strangers meeting via a dating app algorithm to ask each other, "What are you looking for? Now more than ever, I understand the desire to find out if the person you're about to spend a Wednesday night with is looking to smush Free pussy Riverside with you or "significant other"-you. But, um, what if I don't Looking for dating or something what I'm looking for?

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Also, what are all of the options when it comes to answering that question? Can I say, "Someone who cor share their french fries with me?

Here's how to do it. I mean, duh, it's important to figure out what you're looking for in a relationship or non-relationship.

This makes perfect sense in my brain, but in reality, I am constantly telling myself I somethign want a boyfriend even when I really do. I don't know if it's because I listened Looking for dating or something "Independent Women, Pt. But it really is important to ask yourself: Is it a naked friend because you just got out of a relationship?

Own that. Is it an actual partner? Definitely commit to that.

Are you not entirely sure yet, but you want to take things slowly? Say that. Which brings me to On dating apps, I take an early ask of "What are you looking for?

Either way, this match has a certain thing they are looking for. If you don't have any idea what you want with this specific person because you don't even know if they shower regularly yet, it's OK to say "I don't know.

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Even those who 'know' what they want can change their minds. I know, I know.

sometihng I can't share my feelings like an adult woman, so why am I lecturing you on sharing yours? Looking for dating or something, because every time I have pretended my desire to a real relationship didn't exist, I've ended up wasting a lot of time.

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When I have pretended to be cool with diet-dating where feelings hover in the air but are never fully committed to, I have ended up heartbroken and alone. I know, so dramatic. If you're messaging a cutie on the apps and they smoething you, "What are you looking for?

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Oor the good news: If you're one of them, you're in luck. That said, there are other people out there who want to take you out to dinner because they'd like to get married someday, so it's important to be honest about your wants and needs.

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Stringing someone along on half-romantic dates just for the sex that happens at the Looking for dating or something of them is not a great look. You'll usually be able to tell early on if someone is just looking for a nice old hookup. If it's at all unclear though, be honest and reply, "I'm looking Lolking something super casual right now," or "I'm looking to have fun.

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Again, I want to restate Golden's advice and remind you that it's OK not to know how to answer this question. If you do have a particular idea of what you want in mind, then be clear about it.

If you're not sure, Lloking OK to go with the flow. I'm in the middle of a date experiment for a podcast at the moment, and every time I go on a date I wonder, "Should I tell him about this experiment?

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